haven’t blogged in more than two weeks almost. couldn’t bring myself to delete, but I’ll be posting every few weeks, from a less intimate perspective.

i have my undergraduate medical school admisionn exams tomorrow, im ok. except im a little crap in one section.

today was the first day of sem 2, eid was good, i ran out of the home and chucked whatever clothes on, caught a train, and read a book, 18 minutes later got to uni, met up with a friend, had gelato, sat for physics and chem lectures. got myself some food, did not feel like the heavy food that mum prepared and made for eid, 

anyway, i needed to fill up my phone with prepaid, and i went to the shop that is owned by the arab men, i think they are palestinian/lebanese/egyptian, i’ve always thought that the younger guy is kinda cute, tall and broad, nicely built, tanned, he speaks fluent english in comparison to the other workers, i think he studies at one of the many universities nearby. 

he had a kufiya on, and i noticed he kept looking at my scarf, and i suddenly realised my scarf had a green and red stripes on it and it had some relation with the palestinian flag. i guess he was palestinian as he has the primitive levant tan, but he had palestinian eyes, hmm, i don’t know.

and he was taking a little long, he apologised for the long wait and said “by the way I love your scarf” i could feel my cheeks turning pink due to my discomfort.

and i smiled and walked away, smiled because palestine is in all of our hearts, because when you see muslim arab today it was eid mubaraak, my girl friends, my male friends, talking to so many people because this is what we are.

and i also smiled cause the guy was frikkin handsome and said something to me. but it was also one of my mothers designer scarfs, and yeah this is a crAZY SELFIE OF ME AND MA SCARF. 



the final post.

assalamualaykum wa rahmatullahi wa barakuti, a  beginning, and a farewell, that is the funny thing about goodbyes.

i have decided to take a hiatus and a break from tumblr, moreso, an end. I have not yet developed the person I need to be. unfortunately, recently in the past few months, I have been receiving many questions regarding Islam and it’s fiqh. Although I am a student of Islam and study and read, I am not, and do not want to be placed in that position. I am only 18 years of age and not yet learnt of what I want to be.

Unfortunately, my initial objective was to break ties with everyone for 6 months, this decision was made a week and a half ago, i was going to begin with facebook until a couple of people had asked me for help in their projects for great causes. i agreed to this. after, another friend asked me for help in the development of her charity organisation, i decided that this was as indication to stay, I have also stayed on facebook to develop ties with a few people to help me organise a few events in the future (we will both benefit from this). Therefore I have decided to remain on facebook.

I have used tumblr as a sphere for personal and intimate posts, and in the past few months, many people who I know, who know me before they knew my tumblr, talk of it to other people, and pass on this information, this isn’t something bad, but words I post here, and not to anyone else and words I don’t want those people to know about.

Because of the public attraction it has received and the Islamic information that it constantly asked by me, I cannot remain any longer. Also

Despite my zeal for quantum physics, and detest towards content and cell biology, I have prayed istikharah many times for Gods guidance, and have realised that I should not wait for God to place me somewhere good, but I have to go somewhere and God will help me, I have finally decided that I will go and work harder torwards medical school. That is the final decision.

But maybe I may avert, a recent love towards chemistry, the future is at stake in terms of renewable resources and have thought to commit my life to chemical engineering. bas, allahu a’lam. it depends

my people need my energy and ink, and the only way i can help someone, spitually, mentally, and physically is by being a medical doctor.

futhermore, I have to improve my Qur’aan life too, my knowledge of history, my understanding of ahadeeth, and must memorise and learn as much tafseer and ahadeeth and content before my life gets busy.

most of all i will have to improve my relationship and trust in god.

i have not yet developed a personality. or an understanding.

I have two decisions

1) to leave this site publicly and every now and then update my life per month

2)  or leave forever

i think i will go with the latter. 

for now, i am on facebook and twitter. 


If you are unable to or do not have the courage to stand up against injustice, at least don’t stand in the way of those who do.

If u know me or have seen me irl please send me an anonynous yes or number or assumption about me
Literally overhead soneone i kno talk abt my tumblr
And my little sisters friend, her sister who i know irl follws me, tells the stuff i post to her sister who tells my sister who tells me

they are still attacking al-shijaya refugee camp! 

burning it

and now 12 people have been murdered.

got bleach on my best black pants

i think im going to the shops tomorrow and buying three of the same pants before they stock out

thousands are now protesting in sydney against the israeli siege and attack upon gaza. there are thought to be more than 5000 in todays protest. will keep you updated. 

dubai and saudi are the shit of the middle east

planes attacking homes in al shati refugee camp. at least 30 homes are being burnt i think in east gaza. 

loveprism *high five sister* it’s the worst, and they make it look like one mistake and one lil flaw and “ma7adan 7a jawzik” -_-

Everything is about what the people think and what a good potential bride u appear to be
Stupid lebs

marruecosandcouscous they are helping the oppressed in burma and i think have reached out to central african repblic. they are (by thy i mean baraka city) one of the first muslim associations that have interacted and went into camps and are showing it to the world :) watch this https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TdL9eHjmhfk#t=22

if al shaam is corrupted then there is no good in any of you

rasulullah (saw)

really proud of the muslim ummah in france.